Ken Paxton, folks: the guy who inspired it all. He was arrested last week and charged with securities fraud.
Larry Craig reportedly solicited an undercover male cop for sex in a men’s restroom. Isabelle has never even been to a men’s restroom.
Plus: Meet a guy who walked with his goat across America »
John Edwards reportedly used $1 million in campaign funds to cover up an extramarital affair. Cream is a pretty faithful kid.
Rick Perry earned charges of abuse of power and coercion. Bacardi might be accused of coercion-by-cuteness, but no charges have ever been filed.
Plus: Is it legal to raise goats in the city? »
Rod Blogojevich played dirty in politics; Bacardi plays in the dirt.
Ted Stevens failed to properly report gifts said to be worth $250,000. Annie always sends thank-you notes for her gifts.
Previously, Lissie enjoyed both The Patriot and Braveheart. Mel Gibson’s off-color remarks and dangerous driving habits have turned her off from supporting his career.
Plus: 5 cool jobs held by … goats »
For both Hugh Grant and Lizzie, “solicitation” means working hard to get extra treats. For Lizzie, though, treats are entirely food-related.
Drunk driving? Cocaine possession? Sign Persimmon up for hay and hay only. No cocaine and no driving.
Before this DWI incident, June was a belieber. Today, she has better taste in music.
Plus: Want a goat of your own? Here’s how to pick the right breed for you »
Epictetus believes strongly in fate. Was it Paul Ruebens’ fate to be caught doing dirty things in a movie theatre? It seems so.